How to master the street style

As someone probably once said, if you aren’t photographed at London Fashion Week, then you don’t really exist. Today is the last day of the fashion event, a time when the streets of our fair capital are awash with eccentrically-dressed fashion types.
Street style has been around for the best part of the last century, but it’s only now, with the advent of smartphones and social media, that the ante has been upped – clothes aside, the only way to make it onto Instagram is to pose correctly and gone are the days when a simple ‘teapot’ arm will cut it. Today is your last chance to be photographed so to help, we’ve designed a simple cut-out-and-keep guide to keys poses that will ensure that the lens is on you, like fly on carrion.

The raptor

What is it? Bags may come and go, but the giant oversized tote will always be a favourite as will holding it like this thus shortening your arms like those of a velociraptor. For inspiration, see Jurassic Parks 1-3 and/r the trailer for Jurassic World.
Who does it best? Anna Wintour, Alexa Chung.
How to do it. Locate It bag. Ideally, this should be something expensive and desirable (have a look at Moschino Spring/summer 2015) with a short handle. Place bag in crook of arm. Flex arm, Popeye style, keeping the bag at hip height and clench your fist at nipple height. Maintain pose and walk to show/Pret/tube.

The Hilton

What is it? The first documented street-style pose, this is named after its creator, Paris Hilton, who pioneered the stationary camera pose in the noughties. Credit where credit is due.
Who does it best? Caroline de Maigret, Paloma Faith.
How to do it. Place one arm on hip, creating the classic teapot shape. If time allows, splay fingers to display accessories. The other arm should hang at your side with the hand in a very gentle clutch shape. If it helps, imagine you are holding a filled bap that you will never, ever eat.

The half-jog

What is it? Somewhere between a walk and a run because lest you forget, fashion people are athletes.
Who does it best? Emmaneulle Alt, Leandra Medine.
How to do it. Locate a pelican crossing, traffic light or road junction. Stop. Locate both a photographer and safe passage, in that order, and walk/run at speed, checking left and right for traffic (read: more photographers). Repeat.

The banter merchant

 

What is it? Less a pose and more a way of life, this look is all about wearing something absurd, so absurd in fact that you become a meme. The pose itself is almost immaterial. (NB. The look should suggest that the wearer has a car and driver.)
Who does it best? Anna dello Russo (above).
How to do it. This whole look is underpinned by impracticality so check weather on iPhone. Go to wardrobe and find least-weather-appropriate pieces (think fabric, colour and waterproofness) and get dressed. Colours should be clashing, ideally, with hems dragging.